Protect
What do I need to keep myself safe and whole?
Consent and communication
Three ideas that are not interchangeable
Consent belongs to each person. Boundaries are individually owned. Agreements are commitments people make together.
Consent
A freely given, specific and ongoing yes to the interaction at hand. A partner’s permission cannot replace another person’s consent.
Boundary
A statement about what you will participate in, accept or do to care for yourself. It remains yours even when someone dislikes it.
Agreement
A shared commitment people choose together. It may be renegotiated, but renegotiable does not mean unilaterally changeable.
The PL101 stress test: What happens when someone says no? If “no” brings punishment, pressure or retaliation, the problem is bigger than the wording.
Restrict
Am I describing my choice—or trying to control another adult?
Connect
What commitment can we genuinely make together?
Recognize
Is everyone’s no actually being respected, including mine?
Renegotiate
What needs to change through a conversation rather than a surprise?